Wednesday, February 18, 2015

To Share or Not to Share...

I've been thinking about this post for a while now.  It is about our decision to share our special journey to parenthood and the method in which we conceived.  To be honest, not sharing didn't even cross our minds.  We've struggled for so so long with infertility - heartbreak month after month, year after year.  Once we were introduced to the option of donor egg IVF we were honestly just overjoyed with the possibility of actually getting pregnant.  For me, knowing the pure joy of growing life in my womb; and for us as a couple - a family, the chance to experience this absolute miracle together.  Our very own miracles.  Not sharing this news with the people we loved the most was not even an option.  Not to mention the very basic fact that I can't keep a secret and I'm horrible at lying. 

After some urging, I decided to start writing about our experience.  At first, I was nervous about what I should or should not write about.  What is considered taboo to one person is moving and helpful to another. You can't please all the people all the time, which has always been a difficult concept for me personally.  But the more I pondered, the more I thought what a great way to share with our children - when the time is right - the miracle of their existence.  There can be no denying how wanted they were and how long we waited for them.  How many people were involved in getting them here.  How much joy their very existence has brought to our entire extended family.  God works in mysterious ways.  We will never know why it was such a difficult journey getting here or why it took so long for this dream to come to fruition.  But what we do know is that God placed his hand on and worked through each and every person involved in this process - through all those of you who prayed endlessly for us, through those who helped us pay for it, through the doctor and her staff and all the specialists whose expertise and compassionate work got us pregnant, and through our family and friends, whose support and encouragement helped us get through a stressful and difficult period of our life.  There is no denying this was His will and how do you not share that?  I know there are some who might disagree with this decision.  Some who may feel we are sharing a story that is not solely our own.  That perhaps our children would choose not to divulge this information on their own and we should leave it to them to tell their own story.  I did consider this, briefly.  But honestly, these babies are special- well, all babies are special - but these babies are our gift from God and there is no shame in wanting to share how they got here.  Not to mention the fact that we are very secure in our decision that this was the right choice for our family, there is no reason to keep it a secret.  If we had chosen adoption, we would not have kept that a secret, why would this be any different?  These babies are already treasured, loved and showered with prayer, and they still have five plus months before they make their debut!  

Additionally, now that we have made our pregnancy "Facebook" official and shared the blog, I have had numerous people reach out to me about their own experiences and struggles with infertility. Even from some who have been considering donor egg IVF, but just needed some inspiration, moral support or a better understanding of how the process works.  I'm moved and overwhelmed by the positive response and the unending support and prayer we've received; and not just from our immediate circle, but from people we have not seen or heard from in years.  This is where social media is amazing.  Sharing our story has not only been therapeutic for us, but it's resonating with people and helping them in ways we could not have imagined.  I'm sure we'll encounter our fair share of criticism too, I guess that goes with the territory. We'll cross that bridge when we get to it, but for now, the stories will keep on coming.

We are truly grateful for our abundant blessings and look forward to sharing their entrance into this world with you.  


1 comment:

  1. Just finally got a chance this morning to read through your blog...and all your entries about your amazing journey into parenthood!! I didn't realize I'd be party of it. πŸ˜‰πŸ˜ and am so incredibly thankful and honored to be able to share in the beautiful making of a family...however, it was designed to happen. I love you neighbor, friend....and know we support you both 110% of the way!!! The boys are praying you guys have girls...b/c as they told me today...there are too many living on our street!!! Lol